There was one weekend near the end of Week 3 (June 2-4) that I had massive FOMO (Fear of Missing Out)!! And there was nothing that I could do to take my mind off of it. This was the weekend of my best friends bachelor party (for which he flew into Toronto from Calgary to attend with people from all over the country), my boyfriends rugby away game and friends camping.
I had some trouble getting ready to go over to my best friends place before they went out for my other best friends bachelor weekend. I couldn’t find anything to wear that didn’t make me feel frumpy or like a bum. I put some music on to help loosen me up and cheer me up and eventually found something with the support of my boyfriend.
It was great to spend time with Ry (as I had not seen him in months) but it was also really hard when they went to leave for the limo and I couldn’t go with them. I’ve known for quit sometime that I wouldn’t be able to partake in the festivities of this weekend but it didn’t make it any easier. Sure my goal was to walk down the aisle at his wedding as a bridesmaid without a cane (and dance the night away) but that didn’t make the reality of this weekend any easier. There was no physical way I could have made his bachelor weekend work. They offered to get me a wheelchair but being this early in recovery was to risky to attempt anything… and besides I would have fallen asleep somewhere since I had been going to bed at 9 pm for weeks. I wasn’t going to let anything hinder my recovery even if it did make me sad.
I was in a little bit of a funk. I’m not a person that often has FOMO, but this is my weekend of FOMO for several reasons:
- Besties Bachelor Weekend in TO
- Rugby games in Sarnia/London
- Rugby camp-out in Courtwright
- Can’t go back to my home until Sunday evening (FOMO of quiet time in my own house before the roommate returned)
And I couldn’t go to any of it…. uhhhhhh.
This is all worth it, this is all worth it, this is all worth it *repeats quietly to myself*
Lots happening, none of which I can attend or take the extended car ride for, or sleep on a blow up mattress. All legit reasons, but legit reasons still suck!